What steps parents can take if they believe their child is a victim of sexual abuse

The investigation into a former Avon daycare worker brings up a difficult conversation for families: How do you talk to your kids about sexual abuse, and are there warning signs you can watch for?

As the case of former Avon daycare worker Jan Berrios Otero makes its way through the court system, we’re learning more about what parents noticed. Arrest warrants show parents noticing their child was reluctant to get cookies from Berrios Otero and that they hated going to daycare after noticing behavioral changes.

Eventually, it led the parents to call the police over fears the child was being sexually abused.

“All of those things really could be signs, and they could be opportunities for us just to check in,” Alyssa D’Amato, the YWCA New Britain sexual assault crisis service director, said.

She explained that the parents did the right thing by trusting their instincts, and that significant behavioral or emotional changes are a key sign for parents to watch for if they feel something is wrong.

“If there is resistance or big changes of behavior around things like bath time, or going to school. or changing clothes,” D’Amato said.

D’Amato stressed that it’s crucial for parents to have conversations with their kids and empower them to open up.

“Asking directly if they’ve ever been touched on a private area of their body, that’s like really important, and it gives young people the opportunity to share,” she said.

It’s important for parents to believe what their children are saying and to take action once they confirm sexual abuse has happened, like calling police or other authorities, D’Amato said. For a prevention plan, she says a good one to teach young children is the clean and healthy rule.

“Only a caregiver, a parent, or a doctor can look at or touch the private parts of our body, and that’s only if it’s to keep us safe and clean and healthy,” she said.

Parents can also contact toll-free numbers that are available 24/7. This is provided by the Connecticut Alliance to End Sexual Violence: English: 1-888-999-5545 or Español: 1-888-568-8332.